The Accident. Three Years On.

 

If I were pretentious, I would sit here right now and marvel about Parallel Jodie. In Parallel Jodie’s life and useing the most annoying version of Sliders for inspiration; her life is probably better than mine.

However, if every action has an equal and opposite reaction, there must be Parallel Versions of me, aside from the one who just got off the bus. Since this is my blog, let’s have some fun and let me talk about myself in the third person!

In the world where Germany won WW2, Jodie now works for the Government but is also a member of La Resistance

In the world where the Ancient Egyptian Empire never fell, Jodie works as a Shrine Maiden in the Temple of Athena; she provides visions for free, aka she makes shit up and people believe it.

The world where Coffee was outlawed, Jodie is a Master Brewer and smuggler in secret. No one knows how this mild-mannered woman, is keeping people from going stir crazy without the right stuff.

In the world where the Aliens intercepted the Voyager probe, then invaded Earth and made us all slaves, Jodie most probably died in a blaze of glory. Alternatively, most likely, tripped up while trying to escape.

You can tell I watched Sliders since in the real world I just for on with life apart from the simple fact that I cannot wear heels and now walk with a limp. Oh, and that I am not pretentious

God, I sound depressing sometimes, yes the woman who after six months now decides to write a blog post about how much I miss heels.

 

I miss heels the most, which is funny because I never thought of them before, now it is like I have a foot fetish. In the clubs looking at woman’s footwear, marvelling at how high those heels can get. I even miss sitting in the clubs with my feet in the sink, whinging at how “I should have never brought those shoes, but they looked so pretty.”

It’s also a long running joke, that every time i’ve been a bridesmaid, at least by the end of the Wedding Breakfast I am barefoot.

But anyway, three years on.

It still hurts almost every time I put my foot to the ground, even though some days are better than others, I still have to carry deep freeze to numb the damn thing. I can’t run, and it still have arthritis to look forward too, and I have to worry about it always.

And all because I fell off a bus!

Another thing which had changed is my attitude and confidence when I’m on a night out. Most of the time it’s “Be careful on the dance floor because of the foot” or “Don’t have too much to drink, in case you numb your body, get hurt and it happens all over again.”

I watch people dancing and miss the wild abandon I used to have, and the stupid shenanigans I got up too.

And rereading this, my god it looks like I’m having a pity party, but it’s on the anniversary, just indulge me.

I know I’m fortunate that it was never amputated, which was what that Doctor suggested when I was at the hospital. Titanium is defiantly better that that scenario.

Just to give you an idea, these are the pictures of the accident and what the inside of my right foot looks like

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I took one look at this, called an anbulance and smoked

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The moment i realised  i would never wear high heels ever again

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This is my foot, see those two forks. This was taken during the surgery. Pretty, ain’t it?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You may think I’m an asshole for not giving a warning, but guess what. Life doesn’t come with trigger warnings, life isn’t safe, and no one is going to hold your hand.

If you think otherwise, then you are a special snowflake who needs a reality check. Because these pictures, you are looking at them. But this is me, this is what happened to me. This is my new reality.

So from this moment, the geek list is back in action, and I’m adding Going Ice Skating to it, I fully embrace it will hurt like hell. But look at those pictures, who cares xx

 

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